Was thinking (yeah, "thinking", that's what I, being an introvert, do all the time) about starting a blog for quite sometime now. I am an ambivert like normal people. But my introvert personality takes over most of the times (preferring 1 to 1 bonding over bonding with many people at a time, keeping my thoughts to myself, a longing for being liked by people and whatever I do , I do think , would people like it or not).
Different people's lives are driven differently. Some people's life is friend's driven, some1's enemy driven and some people's life is self-driven. And my life??? Its driven by girls(at least for last 5-6 years). I just realized this a while back(thanks to 1 of my friend, who quoted "teri har baat ghoom fir ke , ladkiyo ko impress karne pe kyu aake rukti hai"). Was quite a tough question for me , made me think(yeah, thinking... again). But before answering that question, I wondered "IS THIS TRUE ???". And to my disappointment ,the answer to this was "YES".
When I thought, I would start a blog. The whole idea was to impress girls, but was first waiting to improve my English skills (by the way, that didn't happen, as I realised some more things and started this blog) before getting started. When I joined gym at college time or even now, that too to impress girls. Preparation for CAT this year, joining guitar lessons and many more choices I made were to impress girls.
DASVIDANIYA , a Russian word, means "bye". The word just struck me, when I realised what's driving my life, for 2 main reasons. First, I want to say "dasvidaniya" to life driven by others. I can't let my life remote-handled. I have to get back control of my life. Second, while searching for the answer "What's controlling my life?" and "What do I want to do?", I realised my wishlist is majorly governed by things I would do to impress girls. But at that time, I remembered 1 more wishlist I made after I watched bollywood movie "Dasvidaniya".
Dasvidaniya -the movie was about a man who comes to know that he has only 3 more months to live. He makes a wishlist of 10 things , he always wanted to do before he dies. And he accomplishes all of those 10 things before he dies. A happy (like all bollywod movies) but not so happy ending (at last ,they are making some realistic bollywood movies with common man as central character). But movie made me think( yeah ... again ... the "thinking"... an inseparable part of me) of the 10 things , I would like to do before I die. That day, I was thinking and thinking hard, but I cant come up with a single wish. I swear, you wont want to impress anybody, when you know, you are to die in few days. So many things, I wanted to do in life, went out of the frame that very moment. I thought and thought hard. And this is the wishlist, I came up with:
1) A holiday package to Kerala for my parents
When I was reading the newspaper in last year of college(was already placed), I was mesmerised by some Kerala Holidays pics in an advertisement. My "mummy"(yeah..m old-fashioned...I call my mother.."mummy" and father.."papa") saw me and commented "nice place..isn't it?". And my response was, "mummy I would gift you a package of Kerala on your 25th anniversary next year". Though I made all the arrangements, it didn't happen. But its still there in my list for maybe next anniversary.
2) A new car for my family
When my father bought a car in 2004, I didn't wanted it to be a Maruti Omni. I wanted some other small family car but due to business reasons ,we have to settle for that. The previous car, that too Omni, used to be my pride when I was a kid in school. But after some years, I was even ashamed of telling my friends when asked "Which car do you have?". My answer would be "we don't own a car" or "we have maruti 800". So a new small family car is my 2nd wish(a wagonR or an i10 or a swift would be nice).
3) Adopting a Girl Child
I always wanted to make a difference in life of at least 1 person. I consider adopting an orphan is a very good idea. Provide them good education and good upbringing. And you have made a good citizen, who may in future make other good citizens. So adopting a child is always what I wanted. And I would prefer being called "papa" by a girl rather than a boy. So girl child would be ultimate wish for me. At least 1 or maybe 2 depends on future.
Seemed a stupid wishlist to me, especially when I was making it keeping in mind that I would die in few days. So, I tried to make it sound sane. As life is not a bollywood movie, happy ending isn't guaranteed. What if I died before doing these things??? I persuaded my parents that I would go for life insurance policies for tax-savings rather than mutual deposits. Though my motive was different.
A few of my close friends , already know about this list of mine. And I have talked them into, that they would tell about this to my parents, if something happens to me. And maybe 1 of you, who are reading this blog can remind my friends ,in case they forget to tell about this to my parents.
This is how I want my insurance money to be spent.
1) My parents would go to a holiday to kerala on their next anniversary. I know they wont want to do this, but tell them they have to do this for me.
2) Buy a new car.
3)Donate the remaining money to some orphanage for a girl child. And visit regularly, to ensure she is taken care-off well and her studies got funded.(Though I would prefer if they could adopt a girl child themselves and use that money for her upbringing. But I cant have such big expectations from my parents who are growing older day after day.)